Taste It First

R. H. Palmer lived in different times. Neither telephone nor telegraph yet existed. And the concept of the modern online experience would have been met with accusations of insanity.

Yet, he understood something needing resurrecting. He wrote a song which said:

Angry words! O let them never, From the tongue unbridled slip; May the heart’s best impulse ever Check them ere they soil the lip.

Love is much too pure and holy, Friendship is too sacred far, For a moment’s reckless folly, Thus to desolate and mar.

Angry words are lightly spoken, Bitterest thoughts are rashly stirred, Brightest links of life are broken By a single angry word.

But the words are the tip of the iceberg. As Jesus taught, “Out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks.”

The tone of modern society is a snarl. Social media, unchecked, gives us marching orders for how to respond.

Attack. Defame. Demean.

A single barb creates a cascade of “respond in kind.”

We put a fine coat of makeup on anger, calling it by such pseudonyms as forthrightness or righteous indignation.

Dress it up as you want…it is still anger. It creates problems.

Research says that almost 4 in 10 American families have one person estranged. The distance is many times created by strong opinions.

Things said at a Thanksgiving table. A put-down. An insult. A raised voice. And the family ties shatter.

Solomon knew of the irritation people carried. Angry words fueled the fire of internal wrath.

That’s why he said,

“Be not quick in your spirit to become angry, for anger lodges in the heart of fools.” (Ecclesiastes 7:9, ESV)

In short, the wise man is telling us we don’t have to get angry at everything.

Every viewpoint, whether about politics or something as small as fashion, creates the reflex to rebuke or point out error.

Not every opinion needs to be shared. Learn how to hold your own without insisting that everyone else agree with it.

In a world laced with the poison of anger, how do you and I keep from getting angry?

Ask questions rather than make statements. Sometimes, the best response is, “Can you explain that further?” It will lead to understanding rather than rebuttal.

Don’t respond at all. A mother’s maxim reminds us that if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.

Taste it first.

Paul instructed, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” (Colossians 4:6, ESV)

A woman had a penchant for kind words, even to those who snapped at her. A friend noticed and asked for her secret.

“How do you keep from saying ugly things in return?”

She replied, “It’s simple. I simply taste my words before I spit them out.”

With civility on the line, and perhaps even our humanity, it is best to handle the anger around us with Christian grace and godly responses.

And, if you want to give someone some lip, bite it first. The pain you feel will remind you of the pain you will cause.