How to Be Miserable (OR Not)

Are you miserable?

For some, misery comes from tortured circumstances. Wars, pestilence, pain, and loss twist a life into a noose that chokes the last drop of joy from life. Who could blame them?

But then there are others. They are cranky and act as “Debbie Downers” at any event. A man I knew complained about how dry it was but then griped when it rained.

These miserable people live their lives on a hamster wheel of crankiness and despair. They choose their misery, open the door to it, have it seated on the sofa, and serve it a meal.

Perhaps you need help in being miserable. Here are some ways to enhance the misery experience in your life.

How to Be Miserable

Envy Others

Start your day by envying what everyone else has. Focus on what you lack, whether it’s their relationships, material possessions, or position. Envy fogs a life,  blocking out any happiness you might experience. If everyone is better off, it will fuel your negative fire.

Search for What’s Wrong

Look for faults in life.  You can find many. Traffic is slow. The restaurant food was not up to your impossible standard and was overpriced. It’s cloudy. It’s clear. Pessimism opens a bucket of black paint that obscures all joy and optimism. Remember, focus on the negative; it will swiftly overshadow the good!

Compare Yourself with Others

Use others as your measuring stick. Consistently compare your life to theirs, reflecting on your shortcomings and their advantages. That way, no matter how inadequate you feel, you have a good reason.

Embrace Magical Thinking

Magical thinking is believing that something will just happen on its own. Like a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat, it appears from thin air.  We think that if the stars line up right, or if we hit the lottery jackpot, it will make a difference.

Hang Out with Sour People

Surround yourself with negative, critical, and angry people. Their energy will drain you and plant their weeds in your mind. Ignoring the influence of those around you is key to ensuring your misery.

Neglect Your Basic Needs

Ignore your body’s need for good food, exercise, and sleep. Overindulge in junk food, shorten sleep and skip that morning walk. Letting your physical health decline will add to your emotional distress.

Accumulate Junk

Keep your life cluttered with both physical and spiritual junk. Hoard trinkets you don’t need while letting valuable relationships and experiences slip away. This clutter reflects your internal chaos and brings added stress.

Complain Constantly

Choose to complain instead of taking action to change your circumstances. Vocalizing grievances without looking for solutions perpetuates a cycle of misery.

Avoid Learning

Steer clear of reading, educating yourself, or seeking new experiences. Ignorance is bliss, so why bother? The less you know, the less you can challenge your griping.

Blame Others

When things don’t go your way, blame someone else. Whether it’s circumstances, your boss, or your friends, never take responsibility for your own life. This will surely keep you stuck in a miserable loop.

Desire Dependency

Cultivate a mindset where you expect others to take care of you. Embrace victimhood and wait for someone to rescue you from your unhappiness.

On the other hand, you don’t want your life to reflect that! You don’t have to feel miserable.

How Not to Be Miserable

In a letter written to the Philippians, the apostle Paul was imprisoned unjustly. But the word he chose to write in stone was “joy.”

Take steps to stop being miserable.

Spend time listening to the laughter of children. No one keeps a sourpuss expression in the presence of children’s giggling.

Act on your problems rather than wallow in them. Make a list…what is bothering you…and then decide if you can do something about it. If not, accept it as a gravity problem. If so, get to work.

And the most important–care for others. When feeling down, visit or phone someone who is lonely. The sheer act of caring for another person will lift your spirits. The Bible says to love our neighbor as ourselves. If we love our neighbor, we love ourselves.

Abraham Lincoln said that people are about as happy as they want. So how miserable do you want to become?